My Story
Cracked, but not broken
I am no different than anyone else, with one possible exception to the norm. I had polio as a child, and as a result, my teenage growth spurt revealed a very crooked spine. I was diagnosed with severe scoliosis at 13, and life after that was very different.
From Grade nine to Grade twelve, I was in and out of hospital, and in and out of various casts. I had several operations and spinal fusions, which resulted in having to spend 17 months flat on my back in bed waiting for the fusions to heal.
Life skidded to a halt as far as school and the normal progression of adolescence was concerned. The operations were painful, and I missed my friends, but then again, “you don’t know what you don’t know”. I could not change it, so I had to adapt.
What I do know is that the experience changed the trajectory of my life profoundly, in both positive and not so positive ways.
I did not really understand it until much later, but it really was a loss of not just innocence, but of that period of “in between”, where you insist you deserve “grown up” privileges, whilst whining like a baby.
That extended dependence is training for the real world. I was suddenly in an adult world which was far from my home in Northern BC, and full of people that meant well, but they were managing my illness on limited time and patience.
So What?
It was a total disconnect for me, however the support from my family was amazing. My mother and father spared no expense in time or money to make things bearable for me. At the same time, they had to be there for my two siblings and try to ensure that they had the attention they needed as well.
Somehow my family just folded me in, and life went on as normally as was possible. I am so grateful. One thing that was clear was that being “sick” was not an excuse for bad behaviour. If I was being a brat because I was in pain, I learned to ask for what I needed and not take it out on anyone else. Looking back now, I can see how incredibly blessed I was to be treated so “normally”. I think it really grounded me and prevented me from feeling sorry for myself and becoming too spoiled.
It certainly was not an easy time for any of us, but it was just life as we knew it, and I know that attitude helped me to accept my fate.
It was life changing, but not life limiting.
I remember my father saying to me “so what?”. He did not want me to use my challenges as an excuse for not accomplishing things in life. If I wanted to do something; like go to Europe alone at 17; or go to university after being sick for most of my high school, then that was what I could do. And so, I did.
There are consequences to everything, but the gain for me was more than the loss. I launched out into life on a rocket. I was going to see what the world had to offer me, and luckily, was able to travel and see a lot of the world! I also had a very fulfilling career, and I do know how fortunate I have been.
Black Rock Oceanfront Resort in Ucluelet BC by Dale Pruden
This is a very special place for me. It is the “real” west coast.
The next body of land is Japan! The winter storm watch is spectacular.
My Purpose
I want to work with people who perhaps have not been able to find their passions, or if they found them, have been unable to act on them. Everyone deserves to have the ability to be authentic. To have the potential to do what they want, and to define their path with their own expectations and not some else’s. It is not easy to be true to yourself. We don’t always have the support we need, and we are not all given the tools we need; however, it is never too late. Life is for living your own life the best way you can. None of us is perfect, least of all me, but I do embrace my scars. After all, I earned them, as did you. Learning and growing is part of embracing how you got here. Let’s find out where you want to go from here.
